Newborn twins require a 24 hour sleep / feed schedule

Whether you are having twins (triplets, or higher order multiples) soon, or are already in the first few weeks with your twin infants (your “twinfants”), there is one overarching reality that you cannot escape — newborn twins require round the clock care to support their sleep / feed schedule. You will feel like a feeding, burping, diaper changing machine running on minimal sleep. But, arming yourself with some basic information about newborn twins will certainly help you to cope with the reality of the first few months in your twins lives.

Reality #1: Newborn twins sleep a lot

Newborns sleep from 14 to 18 hours per day in the first week, and from 12 – 18 hours per day by one month. Granted, this sleep is broken into 2 – 3 hour chunks, but they do sleep a lot. Planning your time wisely will allow you to maximize your sleep as well. 

Caregivers need sleep, too

In these early weeks, it is tempting to want to be there for every waking.  But, in the long run, doing so may wear you out — literally.  Think about your options — are there ways that each caregiver can obtain an uninterrupted 4 hour sleep stretch?  If you are breastfeeding your twin infants, you might consider skipping 1 feed (and having another caregiver give a bottle of pumped breastmilk or formula). Or, can another caregiver do all the “extras” that need to be done with a feeding and bring the babies to mom for a ”sleep feed”?

Get creative — that single 4 hour sleep stretch can do wonders for your mental health in these early days.

Reality #2: Newborn twins are hungry often

Newborns tummies are tiny. On top of that, formula digests quickly — and breastmilk digests even faster than formula — leaving an empty tummy that needs to be filled. Newborns will wake when they need to be fed — usually every 2 – 4 hours. 

Gently begin moving your twins toward a schedule

While gently working your newborn twins towards a schedule can begin as soon as you bring them home from the hospital, attempting to force longer stretches between feedings should not be attempted for a while. Newborn twin infants should be fed whenever they show signs of hunger. Still, there are many things you can do to begin the process of moving towards a schedule.  For example, if one baby wakes to feed, you can wake the other baby and feed both babies at the same time.  

Check back with us — we’ll feature an article soon about steps you can start to gently begin moving your babies toward a schedule.

Reality #3: You cannot “spoil” a newborn.

Newborn twin infants do not have the mental capacity to cry for attention or just because they want to be held. At this early stage of life, they cry because they have a need. If your twin infants are crying, respond to them quickly — this builds confidence that they are loved and you will take care of their needs.  Check for the big 3 needs of this stage… Hunger, Burp, Wet.

Lay your twin infants down drowsy but awake

Even though you can’t “spoil” them, that doesn’t mean that you can get away with always holding and rocking your babies to sleep. While it is okay to do this sometimes, you won’t want to do it every time — as your babies will soon require holding and rocking in order to fall asleep.  Your twinfants are learning how to fall asleep.  Most of the time, you will want to lay your babies down in their cribs while they are drowsy but not fully asleep yet. If they begin to fuss, you can pick them up and repeat the steps to get them drowsy before laying them down awake in their cribs. 

While in the short run, it may seem easier to rock them to sleep and lay them down after they are fully asleep — in the not too distant future you will be so glad for making the extra effort to lay them down awake in the early days. We promise!  This can be one of the hardest things to do when you are exhausted and you just want to get the babies down as quickly as possible, so that you can return to your bed. But don’t worry, if you choose to hold, rock, and cuddle your babies to sleep, later gentle sleep training techniques can help to solve any issues that might result. 

Reality #4: Growth Spurts will knock your schedule off track.

Just when you think things are settling down to a routine and the start of some kind of schedule, everything will go off-kilter.  Your babies will experience several growth spurts that will require cluster feeding. Your best bet is to expect this to happen and to respond with more frequent feedings when they need it. Don’t get frustrated or feel that you are doing something wrong, or that there is something wrong with your babies — this is normal.

Trust your instincts

If, however, you feel that your babies are hungry all the time and show some other signs of a problem (such as not gaining weight) don’t hesitate to contact your physician. 

Reality #5: “Sleeping Like a Baby” means a lot of interruptions, noises and needs.

Whoever made up that expression “sleeping like a baby” must not have had one! It’s true that sometimes when a baby sleeps it is a very sound sleep and loud noises will not disturb them.  However, most of the time, your babies will be grunting and groaning, and even crying out — but they often continue sleeping despite these noises. The trick is to figure out when they need to be picked up and fed and when to let them resettle themselves. If you respond to every sound, you won’t get any sleep yourselves! 

Baby Monitors in good measure

While baby monitors are wonderful inventions — sometimes it makes sense to go without a monitor, or to keep the volume on your monitor low. Unless your babies are on the other side of the house, you will hear them when they cry.  Keep the monitor’s volume down so that normal sounds of sleep cannot be heard, while cries can.

Reality #6: Sleeping Through The Night (STTN) is really only a 5 hour sleep stretch.

As soon as you’ve had your babies, people will start asking you, “Are they sleeping through the night yet?” and commenting, “Things will be better as soon as they start sleeping through the night.”  What they don’t know — or don’t remember — is that babies don’t really sleep all the way through the night without waking up until many months down the road.

Your Twins First Milestone

But, somewhere after 6 weeks of age (adjusted), babies will be begin to organize their sleep.   This results in a longer stretch of uninterrupted sleep of 4 — 6 hours, usually happening in the late evening hours. For most babies, this will happen between 3 – 6 months of age.  This is it.  This is what your pediatrician means when they ask about “sleeping through the night”. 

The babies will usually still require 1 – 2 feedings during the night at this stage.  And, since there are 2 (or more) babies involved, this still makes for quite a few feedings in the night. Still, once this longer sleep stretch becomes a pattern, you can claim your STTN award. Cherish it — you’ve reached your first major milestone!

copyright 2010 – TwinParenthood / Kathryn Whiteley

Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays. It is a time to reflect on all the blessings in our lives. It is a time for family, and get-togethers. It holds the anticipation of Christmas without the hustle and bustle (well… maybe a little of that).

We are very thankful for our new online connections. Thank you for being a part of TwinParenthood.

Kat and The TwinParenthood Family

Twin Friendships are relatively easy to manage when twins are very young, but as twins get a little bit older, twin friendships can really be a challenge. Like many things twin, the dynamic is different with each unique set of twins, but there are many common twin friendship struggles.

These struggles get introduced when twins venture into new territory where new friendships can develop — such as school, sports, church, and other extra curricular activities.  These opportunities open the doors to meeting new kids and often times bring separate exposure to new kids.  Whereas in the early years, twins are frequently introduced to new friends at the same time, and have the same opportunities for becoming friends.  Friendships in the early years are often (not always) formed almost as a unit.  Both twins are friends with another child (or another set of twins).  Yet, even with these shared friends, struggles may begin to arise as children get a little bit older and want to stake a claim to a particular shared friend.

One Twin’s Friend

Even in the closest twin bond, when one twin makes a new friend that the other twin may not have been introduced to, or who has had limited exposure to, feelings can get hurt. No one wants to feel like the 3rd wheel. Unfortunately, this circumstance is very common with twins. One twin will often feel like the odd man out. Twins who once got along beautifully are now struggling.  This shows itself in many ways, from temper tantrums to sabotage.

Helping a twin cope

Parents need to be keenly aware of new friendships and help twins work through feelings of being shut out.  This might take the form of a special activity for the other twin to enjoy when their sibling is having a special playdate.  Parents can also actively search out opportunities for the other twin to make individual friendships of their own.  But probably most important, is encouraging your child to talk about her feelings. Help her to put herself into her twin’s place and explore those feelings, as well as putting  herself into the new friends’ position.

Helping a twin to be empathetic

But the burden of understanding should not be placed solely on the other twin.  The twin that is in the process of forming a separate friendship can use some coaching at this critical point as well.  Talk with him about friendships and empathy.  “How do you think it feels for Sally, now that you have a new friend? You don’t have to give up your new friendship, but how can you make her feel better along the way?” Helping your children through to deeper understanding is critical in their development into caring young people.

Ultimately, you cannot control your children’s friendships. But, you can be there to be a listening ear.  You can encourage your twins to talk about their feelings — with you and with each other. You can help them develop a deeper understanding of their twin bond and begin to develop empathetic feelings for others.  You can help them to understand that their actions and friendships are not totally about themselves.  Before you know it, they will have many types of friendships and will be caring young adults.

copyright 2010 – TwinParenthood / Kathryn Whiteley

Whether you plan to breastfeed or bottle feed your babies, expecting parents of twins with an older child often worry about how they can keep their child occupied while they feed twin newborns.

Take the time to explain to your first born that new babies need to eat frequently. They are putting all of their energy into growing right now, so they can be a little bit boring at times, too. If you are able and choose to breastfeed, explain what it is all about — your child will be curious.

Don’t be afraid to ask your older child for help while you are feeding — bring things to you that you’ll need, and help burp the babies by patting them on the back. Being included and involved helps your older child to adjust and to feel needed.

A little advance planning can go a long way to keep things running smoothly for your older child, your twins, and you.

1.  Special Activity Basket.
Well before your 30th week of your twin pregnancy, begin gathering items for a “special activity” basket. The basket can be brought out for your child to choose an item to play with while you feed your twin infants. You can choose to allow your child to keep the new play item after the feeding session is over, or you can replace the item into the basket and put the basket away until the next session.  Both strategies have some advantages.

Putting the item back will help to retain the “specialness” of the items in the basket. You may find that your child has a particular interest in one thing when they choose that item over and over again. But, be prepared for the inevitable melt downs when the item is taken away and put back to the basket. This can be a learning opportunity for your child.

Having this special activity basket will encourage your toddler to look at feeding times as a positive experience rather than a negative one that diverts the attention of mommy & daddy.  This basket will be especially helpful for the first several weeks — until your little one becomes accustomed to the process and learns that a little independent play is required.

Ideas for items for your special activity basket:

• New toys
• Crayons
• Coloring Books
• Stickers
• Play Dough (and accessories like muffin tins, jello molds, cookie cutters)
• Puzzles
• Match box cars
• New videos
• Books
• Felt boards
• Coupons for watching a special video or tv show
• Jobs your child can help with (this is a treat for them), like dusting or hand washing dishes

While you can use the special activity basket as your primary strategy, you won’t want to go to the basket for every feed. It will be important to keep the “Special Activity Basket” fresh and perceived as a special treat. With that in mind, it is helpful to decide on a schedule for which feedings you will use the basket and which you will use other strategies.

2. Snack or Meal Time.
One or two feedings for your twins can coincide with a snack time for your toddler or preschooler. Plan ahead and have the snack prepared in advance. You can put out crackers, cheese, sliced apples and such to allow your toddler to help herself, or contain your child in their high chair to keep probing hands away at a safe distance.

3. Reading Time.
Another feeding could be designated as “reading time”. Again, planning ahead is key. Pick out a book that will hold your child’s interest and ask him to help by turning the pages. You might choose to have a “special” book that is only read during feeding time — to add to the feeling that your older child is special, too.

4. Story Time.
Wait… didn’t we already cover this? Nope. These are stories without the book. Kids love it when parents make up stories — especially when you incorporate your child and other family members into the story. Ask your child to contribute to the story, too. “What should happen next?”

5. Screentime.
While it is important to limit screen time, an occasional educational video or tv show — when it is planned within the context of an enriched environment — can be a sanity saver. Don’t feel guilty about it. One of our favorite TwinParenthood mantras is “You do what you have to do.”

6. Game Time.
Imagination Games are great to play during feeding time.  Here are some ideas to get you started.

• Animal Actors. Have your child act like a… bear, dog, cat, lion, etc.
• I Spy. This can occupy a young child for quite a while. “I spy something red… you’re getting hotter/colder… etc.”
• Mini scavenger hunt. Plan ahead, and draw pictures on little slips of paper and place your clues around the house. One clue leads to the next and so on. For example, the first clue might be a picture of a specific ball. At the ball, you’ll place the next clue, maybe a firetruck. At the firetruck you place a picture of a puzzle, and so on. Make sure you make the hunt long enough, but easy and age appropriate or else you’ll get sucked into helping!
• Word or Counting Games. Have your child bring out all of their stuffies (one by one) and organize them into a zoo in the living room. Then, have your child return them, one by one, to the bedroom and put them into the toy box or crib — Count them up as you go.

7. Location change.
Often times, just a change in location is enough to ensure your child is happy and occupied. Keeping toys segregated to specific areas of the house help with this strategy. The basement toys stay in the basement, the family room toys stay in the family room, etc.

8. The Entertainer.
Have another adult or older child play with your child. It can be very nice to hire a teenager from the neighborhood to come be mother’s helper for an hour after school each day. This can be a special time for your child and a break for you.

9. Adventure Train/Airplane/Bus.
Set up some chairs to create a vehicle and have your child sit down as the driver. Tell him to close his eyes and imagine taking a trip. Where would he like to go? Describe the scenery, describe things that happen along the way. When you arrive at your destination, have your child continue the action by gathering objects from this special place. A ball can be a coconut. A postcard can be a notice for a party. Help his imagination to soar.

10. New “Twin” Dolls.
Getting new “twin” dolls and caring for the new babies (the dolls) can be very comforting to your child. Have your child shadow you and she pretends to feed her infants, too.

As with all things in life, balance is key. Identify the strategies that work best for you, those that allow you to bond with your infants and maintain that special relationship with your older child, too.

Have you used any of these strategies? What else has worked for you?

copyright 2010 – TwinParenthood / Kathryn Whiteley

Join our TwinParenthood Community!

 
Are you overwhelmed and bogged down… finding it tough to make it through the day, the next hour, the next minute? Are you newly expecting twins and afraid of what you don’t know? Are you getting more than a double-dose of twin parenthood isolation? Then you need to join TwinParenthood — in the ‘hood — under the BigTent.

TwinParenthood is very proud to announce our new membership community and twins forums.

 
TwinParenthood is a place for parents of twins and multiples to connect for support and information as we share the joys and struggles of twin parenthood.

Our online community features active forums – where twin parents and parents-to-be can ask questions, offer advice, and occasionally escape from the day-to-day adventures of this thing called TwinParenthood.

You will also find a rich and growing set of FAQ articles on parenting twins, tools for download, and deals and steals gathered from across the internet as well as some exclusive deals negotiated exclusively for TwinParenthood members.

So sign up today — and begin connecting with other twin parents in meaningful way. Connecting.    Learning.   Growing.

Still need more information? Visit our Members page for more details about our membership community.

Attempting a vaginal birth after cesarean (VBAC) is a safe and appropriate choice for most women — including those who are carrying twins, according to guidelines released this week by The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG).  This is great news for women expecting twins.  Previously, VBAC was not recommended for women carrying twins although there were no conclusive studies to suggest that twins posed a higher risk. 

In fact, VBAC was often not recommended for many women, and the rate of C-sections in the United States had risen significantly over the past four decades.  In the 1970′s, the C-section rate was about 5%, but by 2007, it was up at a whopping 31%.  One reason for the increased rate of C-sections was due to insurers, doctors, and hospitals opting for a repeat C-section rather than attempting a trial of labor after cesarean (TOLAC).

TOLAC and VBAC do present some added risk.  If uterine rupture occurs (between 0.5% and 0.9% of the time), it is an emergency situation that can cause serious harm to a mother and babies.  For this reason, TOLAC and VBAC should only be undertaken in a hospital where an emergency C-section can be performed in the event of complications.

Patients and doctors will need to work together on a case by case basis to determine if TOLAC and VBAC are appropriate.  New moms having twins should do their research and come prepared for a discussion with their OB/GYN about the possibility for VBAC with twins if that is their desire.  Patients who encounter doctors that won’t even consider VBAC for a twin pregnancy should consider moving to another doctor.  While there may be very valid reasons why a VBAC is not appropriate for your particular twin pregnancy, you should expect your doctor to cover those reasons with you in detail rather than rejecting the option out of hand.

These new guidelines will provide women expecting twins with more options than were readily available previously.  And when you’re having twins — your options are often limited and out of your control.  So bringing back options is always a good thing.  And reducing the number of “automatic” C-sections is a good thing.  Hopefully these guidelines will help to reduce the overall number of C-sections being performed in the United States.

Source:  The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, “Ob-Gyns Issue Less Restrictive VBAC Guidelines“, July 21, 2010.

Copyright 2010 Kathryn Whiteley — TwinParenthood.com

Can you feed twins at the same time?

Absolutely! However, it doesn’t work out for everyone, so it is best to keep an open mind about how feeding will go.

• “Tandem Feeding” just means feeding both at the same time, this could be breastfeeding, bottle feeding, or a combination of those.  But in most articles tandem feeding refers to breastfeeding more than one baby at a time. 
• Sometimes one infant will have feeding issues or other medical problems that prevent that baby from breastfeeding, while the other baby may breastfeed like a champ.
• Sometimes moms will feed one baby and then immediately follow with the other because a helper is not available or for some reason tandem feeding doesn’t work out.
• Some families choose to breastfeed one baby while another adult bottle feeds the other baby — then with the next feeding, the babies are swapped. This gives both caregivers an additional opportunity to bond individually with each baby.

I’m having trouble getting the hang of tandem breast feeding – is it worth it?

As we said earlier, it doesn’t work out for everyone, so it is best to keep an open mind about how feeding will go. Don’t beat yourself up if it doesn’t work out for you. There are many circumstances that may prevent you from tandem breastfeeding. Only you can decide if it is worth it to continue attempting to tandem breast feed.  Some of the benefits include:

• Tandem breast feeding can cut the feeding time almost in half
• Some moms report an added closeness between the babies as a result of tandem breastfeeding
• Breastfeeding saves on bottle washing and prep time

Tips for tandem breast feeding

• Practice with a lactation consultant present
• Until you get the hang of it, don’t attempt to tandem feed if you’re alone
• Use a helper to get the babies positioned and to help with burping
• Try to practice at least once a day
• Use pillows! Lots of them
  • Use a double nursing pillow for resting the babies (these are horseshoe shaped, stiff foam pillows that will support two babies at the right level and position for breast feeding). Many twins moms recommend the EZ2Nurse pillow.
  • You may need several pillows under the sides of the double nursing pillow
  • Use a pillow behind mom’s back for support
• Try out different tandem breast feeding holds to determine which works best for you.
  • One way that works well is the “football” or “clutch” hold. One baby tucked under your arm on each side with their legs sticking out towards the back of the chair.
  • Another tandem position is to place the babies in front of you with their legs criss-crossing over each other.
• If one baby is better at breastfeeding than the other, get that baby settled first before adding the second baby

If I don’t tandem feed, how can I deal with two hungry, howling babies at the same time?

The trick here is to cue in to early hunger signals and begin feeding the hungrier baby before either baby gets too hungry.  These early cues include:

• Finger or fist sucking
• Nuzzling into your arm or chest
• Opening and closing of the mouth or smacking
• Moving the head back and forth

If feeding is delayed so that the waiting baby is overly hungry, you can attempt delay or distraction techniques. These include: 

• Use of pacifier
• Placing the baby in a bouncer or vibrator chair
•  Toys
• Offering your (clean) finger for the baby to suck

Twin Tandem Breast Feeding Best Practices

• Keep track (chart) your babies’ feeds (time started, which breast L/R)
• Switch your babies’ assigned breast with each feed
• Practice tandem feeding daily for the first several weeks before making any decisions to discontinue tandem feeds
• Watch for early hunger signs and begin feedings early
• Drink 8 – 12 glasses of water daily (too much or too little can impact milk supply).

Having twins and multiples means more of everything — including morning sickness. The majority of all pregnancies experience nausea to some degree, and that increases with each additional baby in the mix.  The severity of the nausea is also increased with each additional baby.

Pregnancy nausea is usually attributed to the increased hormones during pregnancy. Many of these hormones are produced by the placenta. So, when there is more than one placenta (as in many twin pregnancies), more of these pregnancy hormones are produced — causing increased nausea.

“Morning Sickness” can occur at any time of day, but is often associated with the morning because it can be more strongly felt with an empty stomach. In addition, a twin pregnancy can put more pressure on the tummy — increasing nausea.

One little trick to help with this is to keep crackers or a banana at your bedside. When you get up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom (as pregnant twin mamas often must do), eat a little bit. It is healthy for you and your babies — and will help reduce the morning nausea.

Increased nausea is one of many signs that you might be having twins.

Do:

• Eat small meals often
• Take a nap and get plenty of rest
• Learn your particular triggers and avoid those foods and smells that increase your nausea
• Dress in layers so you can peel off if you get too hot (feeling too warm increases nausea)
• Drink lemonade, eat watermelon, or something with ginger — as these help reduce nausea
• Exercise (but talk to your doctor about the amount and type that would be appropriate for your twin pregnancy)
• Eat salty potato chips
• Consult with your doctor — keep your doctor informed of your level of nausea (too much naseua can indicate a problem)
• Eat healthy with lots of protein

Don’t:

• Do not drink a large amount of fluids with meals
• Do not lie down after eating
• Do not skip meals
• Do not cook or eat spicy food

While morning sickness in a twin pregnancy can be more severe and can last longer into the pregnancy, it is survivable — as is just about everything twin related.  Take it one day at a time, and your little sweethearts will be here before you know it.

Did you or do you have morning sickness with your twin pregnancy? Any tips for coping?

Copyright 2010 Kathryn Whiteley — TwinParenthood.com

The age at which twins, triplets or more begin to notice each other and interact varies widely.  A lot depends on how closely you keep your twins in proximity to each other.  Do they share the same crib? Do you place them side by side on the floor for tummy time? or under an arch for overhead play time? These factors all can influence their interactions.

Some twins are aware of their twin from day one. Parents of multiples have reported their twins crying more when separated from their sibling.

Hospitals in Europe have long practiced co-bedding of multiples because of the reported benefits for the infants, which include improved weight gain and growth as well as a reduction in physiological stress.  Hospitals in the United States have begun to follow suit. However, hospitals in both countries are rethinking their policies.  

More recent reports indicate that co-bedding can increase the chances of SIDS, although some sources attribute the higher incidence of SIDS among multiples to be primarily related to low birth weight and not necessarily co-sleeping.   A commentary published in the journal “Pediatrics” on November 30, 2007 titled, “Cobedding Twins and Higher-Order Multiples in a Hospital Setting” concludes:

“Although cobedding multiples has become more widely practiced in hospitals in the United States, neither the safety nor the benefit of this practice has been documented in the published literature. Parents should be encouraged to follow established safe-sleep practices for infants at home.”

Even if you decide against co-bedding your twins, you can encourage their interactions by keeping the cribs close to each other in the bedroom. During activity time, you can encourage interactions by placing your twins together on the floor, side-by-side in the stroller, and holding them face to face with another adult.

No matter what age your twins begin responding to each other, it will happen sooner or later. It would be pretty tough to grow up as a twin without forming a strong twin relationship that involves playing, fighting, and emotional support.  As parents of twins, we long for the day when we see the twin bond developing — and some of us must be more patient than others.

Copyright 2010 Kathryn Whiteley — TwinParenthood.com

Many new parents having twins, triplets or more wonder and worry if they should hire someone to help care for their twins in the first several weeks or months. Based on my own experience and the results of several surveys conducted by TwinParenthood.com, the resounding answer is YES.

• Yes! If you can easily afford to hire help for the first several weeks, you will not regret doing so
• Yes! If you can’t easily afford to hire help, but can scrape together money to hire help, you will not regret doing so

Still, many twin parents will tell you that hiring someone to help you with your twin infants’ care is not strictly necessary — especially if you have volunteer help.

Volunteer help can come in many forms. It may be family that come to stay with you, or it may be a church or neighborhood community that rallies to your aid. Our previous article, Twin Baby Shower Gifts that Provide Real Help for Mom, gives some great advice about how to incorporate volunteer signups into your twin baby shower. 

But, not everyone has a support network to step in. So, hiring help makes sense. Once you have decided to hire help, the next question quickly arises. 

Should we hire help to care for our twins during the day or night?

Day:  Typically you’ll get more for your dollar during the day if you hire someone for daytime help with your twins because you can hire someone that is willing to do more than strictly baby care (fix lunch, do dishes or wash bottles, for example).  And, daytime help is typically less expensive than night help.

Night:  Getting at least one 4 hour uninterrupted sleep stretch can make a huge difference in your physical and mental well being. If you don’t have at least 3 caregivers in your rotation, you will have difficulty being able to achieve at least one 4 hour stretch of uninterrupted sleep. If you are not able to schedule this in without paid assistance, then you should hire night help.   

What type of help should we hire?

The type of help you will need depends a lot upon your particular situation, your financial reserves, and how much volunteer help you will be receiving. If money is unlimited, you can hire several types of help to cover all the bases: a post-partum doula for right after the babies are born, a night-nanny for the first 3 – 4 months, a day time nanny and a housekeeper.  Unfortunately, the reality is that most of us can’t afford all of that.

Regardless of what type of help you decide on, you should interview your candidates to ensure they have experience with newborns. Experience with twins is nice, but not strictly necessary.

Doula:  A post-partum doula has special expertise with newborns and mother care.  A doula is usually more expensive than other types of care. Doulas are often available for over-night care.

Nanny: A nanny may live in or out, but typically a nanny works only for you – in your home. A nanny is usually considered an employee of the household (and thus, you will usually need to pay vacation and holidays, and consider the tax implications). Nannies responsibilities often include additional tasks such as laundry, dishes, and other light housework. Be sure this is discussed prior to hiring your twins’ nanny.

Night-Nanny: A night nanny is a nanny that works at night.  Often they try to rest when the babies are sleeping, but may do some household tasks such as emptying the dishwasher or folding laundry – again, be sure to negotiate this prior to hiring.

Au Pair: An au pair is a foreign national on a work visa for a 1 year term. They live in your home and are paid a small salary, room & board, and travel & insurance expenses. Typically, they are required to take some kind of coursework (which you will need to make accommodations for in their schedule). Keep in mind that an Au Pair is not a 24 hour caregiver although they live in your home.

Daycare Providers: This is usually in someone else’s home or facility and your babies will not be the only ones receiving care. Daycare providers must be licensed.

Baby Sitter: Not always, but often a baby sitter is used on an irregular, as needed basis. Baby sitters also do not usually perform extra tasks such as light housework.  The term “baby sitter” is often used as an over-arching word to describe anyone who provides child care.

Mother’s Helper: Typically the least expensive of all options. A mother’s helper can be a high school student that comes over after school to help with housework and baby care. Usually a mother’s helper does not take on full responsibility for caring for the babies – but assists with mother present.

Housekeeper: One option not often considered is to hire a housekeeper who will take care of the house, the dishes, the bottles, the pump, cleaning the bathrooms – all of the things that you will not have the energy to do.  It is easy to become resentful of your twins’ caregiver who is spending sweet cuddle time with your babies while you are off doing household chores.  Wouldn’t you rather pay someone to do the things you don’t want to do, while you dedicate your time to your twinfants?

All of the options available for the early weeks of care with your twinfants often seem overwhelming. But, don’t be tempted to put it off, to “wait and see” what you’ll need. To be on the safe side, you’ll want to plan, interview, and hire your caregiver before reaching your 35th week. If you are very unsure and expense is an issue, start with hiring a part-time housekeeper or mother’s helper.

Bottom line, you will not regret having the help. 

What did you do in the early weeks or months?

Copyright 2010 Kathryn Whiteley — TwinParenthood.com

Visit us on Facebook