Coming up with Halloween costumes for twins and multiples can be a lot of fun. There are so many possibilities, because so many great things come in twos. Whether you purchase a costume, or make it yourself, the possibilities are endless. It is also fun to do a whole family theme, where mom & dad get in on the action, too. Check out some of these great ideas to get you started, then let your imagination soar!

Classic Twin Costume Themes:

Thing 1 & Thing 2
2 peas in a pod
Yin & Yang
Candy (M&M’s, Hershey’s Kisses…)
Monkey See Monkey Do
Hear no evil, See no evil, Speak no evil Monkeys
Doublemint twins
Double-Bubble gum
Mr. And Mrs. Potatohead
Raggedy Ann and Andy
Sun & Moon (& Stars)
Playing Cards
Grapes
Crayons
Angel & Devil
Pair of Dice
Salt & Pepper
Samurai & Ninja
Dalmatian & Fire Fighter
Cheerleader & Football Player
Ketchup & Mustard
Hamburger & Fries
Milk & Cookies
Peanuts (Snoopy, Woodstock, Charlie Brown…)
Farm Animals & Farmer (cows, horses, pigs…)
Cowboy & Pony
Puppy & Kitten
Butterfly & Caterpillar
Big Cat & Tamer (Lion, Tiger…)
Cat & Mouse
Bride & Groom
Mr. & Mrs. Potato Head
Bumble Bees (Honey Pot, Lady bug, Flower)
Good Witch / Bad Witch
Frankenstein & Bride
Knight & Princess
Tooth & Tooth Fairy
Mummy & Pharaoh
Spider & Buy
Shark & Fish
Frog & Bug
Lemon & Lime
Anthony & Cleopatra
Mac & Cheese
Tarzan & Jane

Cartoon Costume themes:

Tom & Jerry
Scooby-Doo (Scooby, Shaggy, Velma…)
Pokemon (Ash, Brocke, Pikachu…)
The Simpsons (Bart & Lisa, Marge & Homer…)
The Flintstones (Pebble & Bam-Bam…)
Curious George (George & Man in Yellow Hat)
Bob the Builder (Bob, Wendy…)
Arthur (Arthur, DW, Baxter…)
Dora the Explorer (Dora, Boots, Swiper, Diego, Jaguar…)
SpongeBob Squarepants
Backyardigans (Tyrone, Pablo, Uniqua…)
Powerpuff Girls (Blossom, Bubbles, & Buttercup)
Mario & Luigi
Handy Manny (Kelly)
Super Heroes (Superman, Batman, Iron Man, The Hulk, Captain America, Wonder Woman…)

TV Show Costume Themes:

Barney & Baby Bop
Sesame Street (Elmo and Zoe; Bert & Ernie, Big Bird, Cookie Monster…)
Blues Clues (Blue and Magenta…)
Happy Days (Richie & Fonzie)

Movie Costume Themes:

Wizard of OZ (Dorothy, Scarecrow, Tin Man, Lion …)
Batman & Robin
Batman & Catwoman
superman & Wonder Woman
Toy Story (Woody, Buzz, Jessie…)
Shrek (Shrek, Fiona, Donkey…)
Superman and Lois Lane
Star Wars (Darth Vader, Luke, Princess Leia, Jar-Jar, Yoda, R2D2, Chewbacca…)
Harry Potter (Harry, Hermione, Hedwig, Dumbledore…)

Fairy Tales Costume Themes:

Goldilocks & the 3 bears (a great quads costume or mom can be Goldilocks)
Little Red Riding Hood and the Wolf
Peter Pan and Tinkerbell
Alice in Wonderland (Alice, the rabbit, the Cheshire Cat…)
The Cat in the Hat (Thing1 & Thing2, The Cat…)
Jack & Jill
The 3 Little Pigs & The Big Bad Wolf
Little Bo Peep (and sheep)
Peter Pan (Peter, Wendy, Tinkerbell, Captain Hook…)
3 Blind Mice

Disney Costume Themes:

Beauty & The Beast (Belle, The Beast, Teacups…)
The Little Mermaid (Ariel, Founder, Sebastian…)
Snow White (Snow White, Dwarfs, Evil Queen…)
Any Disney Princess & supporting characters
Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse
Donald Duck and Daisy Duck
Lady and the Tramp
Hannah Montana and Jackson or Oliver
Nemo and Dora (or…)
Phineas and Ferb (Perry, Dr. Doofenshmirtz)
Disney Princesses (Ariel, Snow White, Cinderella, Bella…)
Disney Fairies
Winnie the Pooh (Winnie, Piglet, Tigger, Eeyore…)
The Lion King (Simba, Nala, Timon, Pumbaa…)

Hope these lists get you started thinking about the endless possibilities for costumes for twins and multiples. Halloween is all about imagination.  And, making costumes ”from scratch” is a lot of fun — and often creates the best memories.  Tell us what we’ve missed.  What creative costumes have you come up with for your twins?

Copyright 2010 Kathryn Whiteley — TwinParenthood.com

Attempting a vaginal birth after cesarean (VBAC) is a safe and appropriate choice for most women — including those who are carrying twins, according to guidelines released this week by The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG).  This is great news for women expecting twins.  Previously, VBAC was not recommended for women carrying twins although there were no conclusive studies to suggest that twins posed a higher risk. 

In fact, VBAC was often not recommended for many women, and the rate of C-sections in the United States had risen significantly over the past four decades.  In the 1970’s, the C-section rate was about 5%, but by 2007, it was up at a whopping 31%.  One reason for the increased rate of C-sections was due to insurers, doctors, and hospitals opting for a repeat C-section rather than attempting a trial of labor after cesarean (TOLAC).

TOLAC and VBAC do present some added risk.  If uterine rupture occurs (between 0.5% and 0.9% of the time), it is an emergency situation that can cause serious harm to a mother and babies.  For this reason, TOLAC and VBAC should only be undertaken in a hospital where an emergency C-section can be performed in the event of complications.

Patients and doctors will need to work together on a case by case basis to determine if TOLAC and VBAC are appropriate.  New moms having twins should do their research and come prepared for a discussion with their OB/GYN about the possibility for VBAC with twins if that is their desire.  Patients who encounter doctors that won’t even consider VBAC for a twin pregnancy should consider moving to another doctor.  While there may be very valid reasons why a VBAC is not appropriate for your particular twin pregnancy, you should expect your doctor to cover those reasons with you in detail rather than rejecting the option out of hand.

These new guidelines will provide women expecting twins with more options than were readily available previously.  And when you’re having twins — your options are often limited and out of your control.  So bringing back options is always a good thing.  And reducing the number of “automatic” C-sections is a good thing.  Hopefully these guidelines will help to reduce the overall number of C-sections being performed in the United States.

Source:  The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, “Ob-Gyns Issue Less Restrictive VBAC Guidelines“, July 21, 2010.

Copyright 2010 Kathryn Whiteley — TwinParenthood.com

Bathing twins is a challenge.  When they are infants (or “twinfants”), bathing is relatively easy — and yet, there are still tricks of the trade that moms and dads of multiples — who have “been there, done that” can pass along.  Still, the logistics of bathing twins can get a little tricky. TwinParenthood.com’s tips for bathing twins should help.

First, I must say that it is not necessary to bathe your infants daily.  We fell into a routine of bathing every other day (or even every 3rd day) with our infants.  When you have infant twins — life is crazy enough without adding stress to your life with self-talk about how you should be bathing your twins nightly.  As they grew, we retained the every other day routine. It has made our life much less stressful.  Of course, we break our routine when the kids get exceptionally dirty and need an immediate bath.

Second, mostly we don’t bathe our children as part of their bedtime routine.  We found it was a great activity to fit into our regular daily routine — to kill the time and just “get through the day”.  Bedtime was a blur and with feeding, diapering, books, and all the “stuff” of bedtime routines — adding bath time was just too much. So we moved it to another time and are much happier for it.

One last thing before we get to the tips from parents of multiples who have “been there, done that”.  Please do not ever leave your babies or small children alone in the bathtub.  Adult supervision is imperative. It only takes a moment for an accident to happen. Most baby drownings occur when the baby is left alone in the bathroom or in the care of an older child. Don’t risk it. Please keep your baby within arms reach.

Tips for Bathing Twins

1. Detachable Shower Head.  Use a detachable shower head when bathing your twins.  It makes it easier to rinse hair and is entertaining for babies/kids, too.  Be sure to get one with an on/off switch so you don’t have to run the water continuously.
2. Visors or Swim Goggles.  Use a baby bath visor or swim goggles for your little ones when washing their hair. Many kids don’t like the water running down in their eyes and these are a fun option to prevent it.

Options for Bathing Twinfants (Twin Infants)

1. Bathing in the sink.  When the babies were very small, we bathed in the sink, one baby at a time.  My back was already sore and I didn’t want to add pain by bending over the bathtub. We put down a foam bath cushion, filled a little water in the sink and away we go!
2. Bathing next to the sink. Again, a back saver. We sometimes used the hard plastic infant bathtub that we put on the counter next to the sink. These are products that are great to purchased “gently used” rather than new.  There are folding options (for saving space), molded hard plastic options, and foam lined options. There are many infant bathtub options, and really any of these products are about as good as the next.
3. Plastic bath seat.  After the first several weeks, we moved to the tub using a plastic bath support or seat.  These are not the “sitting up” type of seats, rather, they cradle the baby in the tub and support your twinfant’s head.  Most often, we opted to have one baby in a bouncer chair next to the tub while one baby got mom or dad’s full attention in the tub.  But, these can also work with both babies in the tub together.

Options for Bathing Twin Babies or Toddlers

1. Blow Up Bathtubs.  When they are starting to sit by themselves (usually between 4 – 7  months), and are more active, nothing beats a blow up bathtub for a fun and secure bath. These little baths are the perfect size for sitting a baby at each end of the tub, facing each other.  The babies are able to interact with each other and play in the water.  The blow up rim helps stabilize them when sitting.  As when they are younger, it is still crucial that you always keep your babies within arms reach.  Also, never fill the large bath tub with water which could allow the inflatable bath tub to float up and tip out your precious cargo.
2. Laundry Baskets.  When they are sitting up well, a plastic laundry basket (or two) is tons of fun for babies to enjoy the bath. Since there are slots in the baskets, the water flows through the basket, while the basket offers support for the baby sitting up.
3. Baby Bath Seats. Although we tried these, these were never my personal favorite. If you opt for these, please be sure to get a newer model — as the older models are not as safe.

Summer Pool Fun

 Blowing up a large pool or filling a hard plastic pool with water is a big undertaking when you are caring for twins.  It’s fine and great occasionally, but not something you want to undertake every day.  And besides, those larger pools pretty much require that mom get in the pool with the babies.  When the babies are still somewhat unstable, it is then a challenge to help keep them sitting upright. 

Little blow up bath tub to the rescue!  Our little blow up tub can also transition out-of-doors for the perfect outdoor pool for twin babies. These little blow up baths are so great for fun water play for twin babies in the summer. Again, place one baby at each end of the tub, and they can splash away. Best of all, mom doesn’t have to swim, too!

Hope you find these twin bath tips and summer pool tips helpful. I think the best piece of advice about bathing twins I’ve heard is to “just have fun”. Something about water seems to strip away not only the dirt, but also the stresses of the day.  I hope you enjoy your little ones in the bath and pool, and I’d love to hear your twin bath time tips. Please leave a comment.

Copyright 2010 Kathryn Whiteley — TwinParenthood.com

I was sitting around with a couple of twin friends the other day, when we began talking about what we had in our diaper bags. We had a good laugh when we thought about what our old work friends would think about our highly stimulating conversation. But, none-the-less, we continued our discussion and uncovered some really helpful “must have” items.

These friends had a couple of suggestions that had not occurred to me.  So, I posed the question online to my friends in Eastside Mothers of Multiples (my local twins club) and received even more helpful tips.  These are tips from twins parents that have “been there — done that”.

Many of the parents use the “plastic bag system”.  Some diaper bags are fantastic, with all sorts of special pockets — but even in those, it is helpful to further organize the contents of your diaper bag.  Clear plastic zipper bags (aka “Ziploc Bags”) of different sizes make it easy to find things and to keep up your inventory.

Diaper Bag Basics

Of course, every diaper bag needs to have a good selection of the basics. This is not intended to be an “end-all, beat-all” list of the basic stuff. I’ll list it here for the brand newbies out there. But, it doesn’t take even sleep deprived new parents of twins, triplets, or higher order multiples long to figure out this basic item list. If I’ve missed something obvious, please feel free to leave me a comment and point it out.

Outside the Diaper Bag

1. Plastic Bags in dispenser.  This is a neat trick — buy one of those plastic bag dispensers that attach to a dog leash.  Attach them to the outside of your diaper back, and you are set for disposing of diapers or wrapping up soiled clothing.
2. Hand Sanitizer.  Some of the travel sized hand sanitizer products come in a little neoprene case with a clip.  Attach to the outside of the diaper bag for convenience — you’ll use this a lot!
3. Luggage Tag.  A handy luggage tag with your cell phone number — in case you lose the diaper bag.

Inside the Diaper Bag

1. Diapering Bag.   This gallon sized plastic zipper bag has all the essentials for a diaper change.
   • diapers
   • travel pack of wipes
   • diaper creme
   • hand sanitizer – travel size (yes, one outside the main diaper bag AND one inside in the diapering ziploc.)
   • changing pad
2. Clothing Bag.  This gallon sized plastic zipper bag contains 2 changes of clothes
3. Pacifier Bag.  For those that use these, this small plastic zipper bag contains 2 extra pacifiers.
4. Burp Cloth/Extra Blanket.
5. Feeding Supplies.
   • Bottles
   • Packets of formula (premeasure your own to save money over pre-packaged serving sizes)
   • Bottled water
   • Bibs (disposable is handy)
6. First Aid / Medical.
   • Mini First Aid Kit (with band aids, anti-bacterial ointment or spray, gauze, cleanser wipes, etc.)
   • Medications.  Ask your pharmacy for an extra label and small bottle for your child’s medications. Even if you normally administer medications at home, having a back up supply is so  helpful “just in case”.

Beyond the Diaper Bag Basics

1. Leashes. I’ve gotta confess, I Love Leashes! We used the lightweight harness type with dog leashes that extend/retract. These were small enough to be able to keep in our diaper bag so we had them when we needed them. Keeping kids safe should always be a priority.
2. Entertainment.  One or more gallon sized zipper plastic bags filled with distraction.
   • books
   • crayons or markers / paper tablet / stickers
   • duplos / legos
   • electronics (music, video, etc.)
   • small car
   • bubbles
3. Snacks.  One or more small hard plastic containers (Tupperware) with quick snacks.
   • crackers
   • cereal or cereal bars
   • cookies
   • mini fruit cups
4. Adult Needs.  One zipper bag with adult essentials.
   • spare keys
   • tissues
   • extra cash

Now, it’s been a while since I hauled around a twin diaper bag, but I do still often bring a backpack crammed full of some of these same items. You never know when you’ll have an unexpected need when you’re out and about.   I know there are many more fantastic tricks “out there” — because there are so many creative parents “out there”.  Please leave a comment and share your special tip or trick.

Copyright 2010 Kathryn Whiteley — TwinParenthood.com

It seems that sleep issues plague all parents at some time or another.

But for parents of twins, triplets, or higher order multiples, it seems like issues with sleep are magnified because every sleeping moment is so precious.  While there is no “magic bullet” to solve all sleep problems, the wake up light system (or “morning light” system) comes pretty darn close to it.

The wake up light is simply a light plugged into a timer. Place the wake up light where your twins can see it from their cribs or beds.

Crucial to the success of the wake up light system, is the consistent application and enforcement of the sleep rules. Make a poster with your sleep rules and place it on the wall near the wake up light. You can include a simple drawing of a child in bed with their eyes closed.

When you first introduce the light and the sleep rules, do it at a time OTHER than bed time or nap time. You can read and point to each word, you can point to the drawing of the sleeping child, or you can pantomime the actions as well as acting out the opposite of each. This is the one and only time you would ever act out the opposite of the desired actions.  This is done just so they understand, and you don’t want them to make a game of doing the opposite of the sleep rules. Talk about the wake up light and point to it.  Turn the light on to show what it looks like and explain, “when it comes on, you can get up!”.  Then, turn the light off and review the sleep rules again.

Review the sleep rules every night at bed time.

If they violate the sleep rules, don’t get angry. Just calmly say “It’s sleep time.” and take them back to their bed and lay them down. If you need to, you can repeat the sleep rules in a monotone whisper: “the light is off: lay down, close eyes, be still, be quiet”. Do not linger, do not give kisses, etc. just lay them in bed then leave the room. Do this as many times as you need to do it — do not waver, do not get angry… just matter of fact and boring.

If there are some bad habits to be broken, it might take 3-4 days of this “matter of fact” putting them back in bed and repeating the sleep rules. After a few days they will get bored, but you might have to be prepared to repeat this action many, many times over in a night/morning during the training period. Don’t get discouraged. If you are consistent and really don’t give them any power by responding in a different way, talking with them, pleading with them, scolding them, they will get bored and will stop violating the sleep rules.

To help your twins feel successful in the beginning, you can set the light to come on earlier than your ultimate desired wake up time — early enough that you KNOW they will still be asleep. That way, when they wake up, the light will be on and they can start their day right away. The first few days you can plan to get up early and be ready to greet them with “The light is on, Hooray! Good job!”. You can then move the wake up time gradually back to the actual time you want them to wake up. Depending how far you need to move their wake up time, you’ll want to go in 5-15 minute increments and leave it at each setting for 2-3 days.

Be very animated about all successes (especially in the first several months). Anytime they get up after the wake up light has come on, make a big deal out of it.  “Good Job! Look! The Light is on!  Time to get up! Good Morning!”.  Anytime they get up when the light is not on, be very monotone and boring, “Look. The light is not on. Sleep Time.” 

What age is appropriate to start using the wake-up light?

Babies as young as 7 – 8 months can use a wake up light. The nice thing about starting at a very young age is that the wake up light quickly becomes a natural part of their life — almost like the sun rising.  A young baby can sometimes take longer to get the hang of the light — but when you are consistent and continue to direct their attention to the light, they will eventually get it.

Of course, it is always important to assess the reason for any violations of the sleep rules. If there is a need that must be taken care of, do so as quickly and quietly as possible. Do not talk unless critically needed.  As the adult, it is up to you to judge if a violation of the rules is reasonable under the circumstances.  If it is not reasonable, do not argue, discuss, or explain — just revert back to the monotone,  “The light is not on. Sleep Time.”   If they are old enough for discussion, there will be time during daylight hours to discuss why the violation was not okay.

Toddlers do very well with a wake up light system, but older children can still benefit from it as well.  Sometimes, especially in the winter, it is hard to tell if it is time to get up in the morning because it might still be dark at the “normal” wake up time for your child.  The wake up light can help a child who wakes in the night wondering if it is time to get up.  If the light is off, it is still sleep time.

Hopefully this introduction to the wake up light system has given you a good overview. The wake up light system solves many different kinds of sleep and bedtime issues, and we’ll get into specific scenarios in future articles.  In the next article in this series, we’ll talk about how the wake up light can help with children that think that bedtime means playtime.

Copyright 2010 Kathryn Whiteley — TwinParenthood.com

Bed rest in a multiples pregnancy is very common. Don’t be alarmed.

When you are on bed rest, it is very important to follow your doctor’s instructions. You’ll want to do everything possible to keep those babies in utero as long as possible.

In most cases, your doctor will want you to stop many “normal, everyday” activities.  Some things you’ll want to ask about:

• Picking up older children
• Driving
• Walking
• Stairs
• Shower (or Bath)
• Cooking
• Sitting upright
• Light Chores
• Sexual Intercourse
• Exercise

Make “Bed Rest Buddies”

After gaining an understanding from your doctor about what you can or should not do, you’ll want to connect with other multiples moms also on bed rest. There are some great website communities for women on bed rest. A fantastic resource is sidelines.org. Connecting with others on bed rest can be an emotional lifesaver. Also, often times these bed rest buddies develop into lasting friendships as you and your pals raise your multiples.

Prepare for Bed rest

Set up a bed rest station in your main living area.  Some things you’ll want within arms reach:

• laptop with internet connection
• snacks
• water and other drinks
• pencil / paper
• books and magazines
• TV remotes

What else can you do? 

• Reconnect with friends
• Get Ready for Babies (Pick names, update your financial records – wills, etc.)
• Read Parenting Books
• Craft Projects
• Work (discuss with your employer options for working from home using your laptop or a telephone)

Being on bed rest can be challenging, but it can also be fun. Like many things in life — it is what you make of it. So take a sunny approach and see what you can get accomplished.

Copyright 2009 Kathryn Whiteley — TwinParenthood.com

Getting kids to bed on time can be a challenge. My kids have always been very early risers no matter what time they went to bed. So, we quickly learned that an earlier bedtime meant a little respite for us. If you have twins, triplets, or more, getting kids to bed on time can be even more of a challenge because of “twin escalation syndrome” — that is, misbehavior tends to escalate exponentially.  So, here are my top 5 tricks to make it happen more often than not (bedtime on time, that is!).

Top 5 tricks for getting kids to bed on time

Start early.  Our bedtime routine starts a full hour before we intend to have our kids actually in bed.

Schedule. Our bedtime routine is the same every night. We honor our schedule. We rarely plan evening events that will disrupt it.

Read. We read at least 20 minutes to our kids every night. It helps with developing literacy and has a calming effect. We snuggle up on the couch with a blanket, read, and talk about our books.

Reward. Be sure to take the time to tell them they are doing a great job. Pick out something they are doing well and tell them.  “I like how you…”

Ritual. Build in rituals that you perform consistently every night.  For us, it is tucking in the stuffies a certain way, and saying the same words as we leave their room, “Good Night, Sleep Tight, See you in the Morning Light”.

I have to give a special thanks to Twittermoms and www.dramau.net. Because of illness (mine and my kids), I’ve really been off my blogging routine. They inspired me to get back on my routine.  Just a quick little post to break the ice… and now I feel invigorated to begin anew. Thanks, guys!

Although parents of twins, triplets, or more are often “maxed out”, it is still important to make sure you are doing little things to help boost your baby’s intelligence.  It is not difficult, and these little things can help to ensure your children grow to be inquisitive with a desire to learn.

Scientists continue to conduct research into human intelligence. While it is true that genetics play an important role, environmental experiences early in life are a significant factor in how much of that genetic potential is reached. Exposing your twins, triplets, or higher order multiples to an enriched environment can exercise brain synapses — leading to forming more and stronger brain connections.  I’m not a scientist, but I find this field of study fascinating, and I did strive for an enriched environment for my twins. My efforts were rewarded with bright, intelligent kids with a curiosity for life. 

Things you can do to enrich your baby’s environment

1. Talk. The number one thing you can do to maximize baby intelligence is talk. How easy is that? Talk about everything. Talk about changing your baby’s diaper. Talk about the weather. Talk about being lonely – or having visitors.  Talk about the changing seasons.  Just talk.  At first, it might feel strange talking to these little infants that couldn’t possibly understand a word you are saying. But if you keep up a running narrative about what you are doing, pretty soon it becomes a habit and is easy to do. And, sorry folks, the television does not count as talking to your baby. If you do none of the other things in this list – talk.

    

   Info:B. Hart and T.R. Risley studied the amount of words spoken in homes and correlated it to IQ and academic performance through fifth grade. Based on their researched, they concluded, “The most important aspect of children’s language experience is its amount.” Learn more about their research from their book, Meaningful differences in the Everyday Experience of Young Children.

    

2. Count. Since you are already talking to your babies about everything you do, it is easy to begin counting everything you do as part of your narrative. Count the stuffies as you put them away, count the dishes and the cups, count the buttons as you dress your twins, triplets, or more. Count forwards, count backward. Just count.

    

   Tip:As your twins, triplets, or more grow into toddlers and sharing becomes an issue, ask them to count to share a toy. “Count to 10 then it will be your turn.” At first you will do the counting, but ask them to join with you. “Count with me… one… two… three…” Count very slowly so they can keep up.

 



 

3. Sort and Group. Now, you are already talking and counting, so start grouping.  Sort the toys by color, resort them by size. Count them in their groups. Talk about differences in size – “Oh, there is a big truck! Look at it next to that tiny little car!”

   TIP: Introduce the concept of ‘value’ at an early age by asking them to group 5 small toys and then trading that for 1 bigger toy. You can do this with a pretend store. When you are ready to purge some baby toys, buy a couple of toddler toys and then ask them to find 5 baby toys to trade in for a “big boy toy”.

 

4. Breastfeed (or not). There is conflicting information about the benefit to intelligence of breastfeeding.  If you can, then breastfeed. If you are not able to, then pump and bottle feed. And if you are not able to pump, don’t worry that you are not doing your best for your babies. You are… whether you breastfeed or bottle feed, just be sure to cuddle, love, stroke her head, gaze into her eyes, and talk.
5. Music. Turn off the tv and play Mozart.  Many studies have shown a correlation between listening or learning to play music and performance of math tasks.
6. Walk. Get outside and walk with your babies everyday if you can. Expose them to the world around you. If the weather limits you, do your best to make it happen when possible. And when you are stuck indoors, find some active play and exercises you can do together.

No matter how tired you are, doing these things will help boost your twins’ intelligence, help them grow to be inquisitive with a desire to learn, and will have an added benefit for you.  Doing these things will help lift your mood. And when you’re sleep deprived from taking care of twins or more, these little lifts are huge. Give it a try.

Copyright 2009 – TwinParenthood.com / Kathryn Whiteley

TwinParenthood.com is pleased to turn over this space today to guest author Ilana Long, mom of now school aged twins Benji and Marina.  This story is excerpted with permission from Ilana Long’s humorous multiples parenting book, “The Binky Conspiracy”.  The book is available at Amazon.com

Wee-Wee-Wee All the Way Home

“It’s all to do with the training; you can do a lot if you’re properly trained.”             -Queen Elizabeth II

Steve and I lay in bed, bickering at midnight, as if this decision would alter the course of our childrens’ lives. “I think it’s time we just go military on ‘em and get it done with,” he asserts.

“I don’t know.  What if one of them gets it, but the other isn’t ready.  Let’s just play it by ear.”

We are at an impasse about the path to potty training our two-year-old twins, Benjamin and Marina. Steve, a math teacher, wants to take the logical, ordered approach. I want to go with a more creative, freeform method. 

To be fair, I have to admit that Steve’s techniques have always been the route to success in our previous child-training efforts:  sleep schedules, feeding schedules, consistent discipline.  Nonetheless, I feel a need to argue with him, if only to keep in shape for these tactical bouts. 

“C’mon, Hon,” I add, “They’ll pick it up at their own pace.  I promise they won’t go to their Microsoft interviews still sucking their thumbs and wearing diapers.”

He is unmoved.  “Look, let’s try it my way.  If they’re not potty trained within the week,” he concedes, “we’ll reassess.”  We’re like some kind of miniature parenting focus group, awaiting results from our study.

For each child, I purchase three pairs of outrageously overpriced training underpants, imagining, in my naiveté, that these will last three days.  We have waited until the heat of summer in their second year, so that we can let them run around naked on the back deck, and, hopefully, become aware of the fact that they are peeing. We fill up a little wading pool for them to play in, and explain the rules.

“Alright.  No peeing in the pool.  If you need to pee, go and sit on the potty,” I say, gesturing to the lovely addition to our outdoor patio furniture.

“Okay,” says Benji as he is peeing out a stream into the pool.  “Oh, look.  I peed!” He is thrilled with this visible action that he is now able to perform with his useful equipment.

Not to be outdone, Marina exclaims,  “Ohp.” Bowing her legs, she opens her eyes wide with surprise, “I can pee, too!”

“Run to the potty.  Run. Run!” I shout, knowing full well this is a futile effort.  The damage is done.  Simultaneously, they race to the potty chair in a frenzied game of musical chair, and try to sit on top of each other. 

“Me first,” says Benji.  And seven seconds later, “Nope.  I can’t pee.”

That afternoon, we go through all six pairs of underwear.  I race to the store and buy 12 more pairs.  They are ridiculously pricey.  I consider taking out a second mortgage on the house.

That night, we put the kids to bed in underpants.  I know. I know. Well, now I know.  You could have told me earlier that most toddlers sleep in diapers, even after they are potty trained during the daytime.  Hours later, I’m wide awake, running the dryer on high and breaking out the few training diapers I had too-hastily stashed away in my earlier over-confident delirium.

(more…)

As with singletons, it is normal for twins, triplets or more to go through phases where they are frightened of the dark, or wake up in the night upset, crying, afraid, or in “need” of something from you.  But since it is often associated with developmental stages, it can be more difficult for parents of multiples because often times more than one child is struggling in the night at the same time.  Sometimes one upset child will wake up another, making things more difficult and complicated to resolve.

Babies and toddlers understand our words more than we think sometimes. Talking about it always helps. Several things helped in our house:

1. There is a great book, titled “Owl Babies” by Martin Waddell.
   It’s about baby owls that awaken in the night and their mother is gone. They worry about what will happen to her and then her return reassures them. You can read the book (over and over and over and over) and talk about how it is normal for mommies (and daddies) to not be there when they wake up in the night.
2. The “wake up light”. This is a light that comes on when it is time to get up in the morning. You hook up a night-light on a timer. When it is sleep time, the light is OFF… when it is okay to get up, the light comes on. How does this help? In the middle of the night, when they awaken and cry, you can come into their room.. point at the light and say in a reassuring voice, “the wake up light is not on, time for sleep”.  Check back for a more extensive article on how to set up and use the wake up light system — coming soon.
3. The bedtime talk.  At bedtime, we always talk about what to do if they wake up in the night. “Think about why you woke up… are you cold? pull up the blankets (practice)… are you hot? take off a blanket (practice)… do you wonder if it is morning yet? check the wake up light (practice – point to the light)… snuggle into your bed, close your eyes, snuggle up with lovey, etc.” Although this conversation is about what happens in the middle of the night, it is reassuring and helps with the bedtime routine, too. Have this conversation every night — for months.
4. Twin-to-twin comfort. Are the beds close together? Can the kids touch each other? After the three above things were in place, one night we said, “Tonight we’re going to go out and you’re going to go to sleep with your lovey. Reach over and hold hands with sister / brother. Isn’t that nice? You’ll be together just like the owl babies!”
5. Consistent bedtime routine. Every night we’d use the exact same words as the last things we’d say when leaving the room. This routine was reassuring… they knew what was going to happen: mom and dad would go out and not come back until the morning — when the wake up light comes on. Be sure you are there when the morning light comes on. Say something like “Night-night, sweet dreams, I love you, see you when the wake up light comes on!” all very sing-song. And then, don’t get pulled back in. Make sure you have done EVERYTHING before you say these words. If you go back, it undermines the routine and they learn “delays” as they get older… “wait! I need a drink!”… “wait! I need a kiss!” Decide what things you will do for them each night. Then make sure you do all of them… try to do it in the same order each night. If you decide you are going to add something to the routine, add it at the beginning — not as the last thing. Adding it at the front end keeps the rhythm and shouldn’t trigger the idea that more things can be added at the end.

I hope these ideas spark some ideas that might help at your house.  What else has worked for you? Please leave a comment — help out another struggling parent.~

Copyright 2009 – TwinParenthood.com / Kathryn Whiteley

* I was not compensated for the mention of this book. It is a personal recommendation only.